Garage Door
The boss walked into the office one morning not knowinghis zipper was down and his fly area wide open.His assistant walked up to him and said, 'This morningwhen you left your house, did you close your garage door?'The boss told her he knew he'd closed the garage door,and walked into his office puzzled by the question.As he finished his paperwork, he suddenly noticed his flywas open, and zipped it up. He then understood hisassistant's question about his 'garage door.'He headed out for a cup of coffee and paused by her deskto ask, 'When my garage door was open, did you see myHummer parked in there?'She smiled and said, 'No, I didn't. All I saw was an oldminivan with two flat tires.'
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Hearing aid
An elderly gentleman...Had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to thedoctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearingaids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctorsaid, 'Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased thatyou can hear again.'The gentleman replied, 'Oh, I haven't told my family yet. I just sit aroundand listen to the conversations. I've changed my will three times!'
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Newborn baby
Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement center weresitting on a bench under a tree,when one turns to the other and says: 'Slim, I'm 83years old now and I'm just full of aches and pains. Iknow you're about my age. How do you feel?'Slim says, 'I feel just like a newborn baby.''Really!? Like a newborn baby!?''Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants.'
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New restaurant
An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating,the wives left the table and went into the kitchen.The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, 'Last night we went out toa new restaurant and it was really great. I would recommend it veryhighly.'The other man said, 'What is the name of the restaurant?'The first man thought and thought and finally said, 'What is the name ofthat flower you give to someone you love? You know... The one that's redand has thorns.''Do you mean a rose?''Yes, that's the one,' replied the man. He then turned towards the kitchenand yelled, 'Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to lastnight?'
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